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WELCOME TO DIRTY DIVORCE 101 and
QUALIFY FOR YOUR DEGREE AS DOCTOR OF DIRTY DIVORCE

What will it take to make you a divorce expert? You can earn an advanced degree or receive on-the-job training. And if you're getting a divorce then you are already living in Divorce Hell, racking up credits through your own work-study program. In our Online Humor Course, Dirty Divorce 101, you will learn some basic vocabulary: adultery, alimony, attorney, child custody, child support, depression, ex-parte, family court, hearing, joint custody, judgment, litigation, marriage, mediation, paternity, prenuptial agreement, pro se, quit claim, restraining order, sanctions, separation, settlement, spousal support, subpoena, visitation and even writ of execution. With the help of jokes and cartoons, we will train you in the art of divorce survival.

But there is one term you will never see here; uncontested divorce. Like the Sasquatch, the Loch Ness monster and the yeti; there are numerous reports of it's existence, but no one has ever seen one except in a fairy tale.

To receive your PhDD. and to be addressed as, "Doctor of Dirty Divorce", please enroll in this simple, free online humor course.

Learn anytime, anywhere; even in the hallowed halls of family court as you and your attorney wait and wait and wait. Your attorney's time is being wasted, it's true, but there is compensation- YOUR life savings. Now you, too, can finally get your money's worth. Learn something really valuable from your lawyer. Don't just sit on those benches and bitch and gloat; get training that can save your life. If you select topics carefully you may save your house but not for your spouse.

HOW IT WORKS
Once you enroll in Dirty Divorce 101 online it's as easy as point (not aim), click and learn. You access your class through your web browser and the Internet. All you need to do is log on anytime, 24/7 whether you're at work, at home or in court. If you're living in your Porsche, then check out the local Internet café. Then meet your online faculty and start learning. This is training you won't want to miss if you want to save your business, your car, even your kids.

TAKE A TEST DRIVE
We guarantee nothing but what do you have to lose? Its free.

HOW TO ENROLL
Enroll in the upper left-hand corner and we'll email you our DIRTYDIVORCE NEWSLETTER announcing each new lesson. Then you're on your way to the opportunity of a lifetime: becoming a certified divorce survivor.

Here is Lesson #1 While waiting for your hearing, debate the comparative attributes of the following with your attorney:

1. Adultery by reason of insanity. (Not so fast Californians; you're in the inner circle of Divorce Hell; "NO FAULT DIVORCE".
2. How to qualify for "Aid to families with dependent children" until the stock market recovers.
3. The comparative benefits of mediation, arbitration and decapitation.

Be sure to join the Dirty Divorce Community so that you can receive our bi-monthly Dirty Divorce Newsletter and your password to post on our Bulletin board.

Click here for newsletter@thedivorceforum.com

You can't afford to pay your attorney to listen to all your ravings so join us and buddy up; this way you can avoid your therapist's couch at least one day a week and also give your friends a rest. What are friends? They're the other people with couches. The ones you're not allowed to sleep on anymore.

Join us; misery loves company and we've been there and we understand.

DIRTY DIVORCE HALL OF SHAME
TOP 10 DIRTY DIVORCES in HISTORY
PLEASE VOTE FOR YOUR TOP 10

"Tying the Not in Hollywood -The Latest in Hollywood Divorce Gossip"
by Sean Crespo
What do Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise; Robert Downey Jr. and Deborah Falconer; Meg Ryan, Russel Crowe and Dennis Quaid and Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger have in common? In Hollywood, only your stage name is "'til death you do part".more

DIRTY DIVORCE CHECKLIST

You won't need the Marquis of Queensbury to explain the rules here. You've probably heard that in divorce- there are none. It's every man for himself and no holds barred. And if you decide to box like a gentleman or a lady you can join some of us in the loser's circle. But if you do land there at least you will be able to live with yourself. Which is a good thing since you'll probably be alone.

If your marriage is in trouble, or if you think it is, be sure to identify the situation honestly. That means asking a professional. In my case, I couldn't identify my trouble going in and I was blinded by the atomic bombs on the way out. Which proves, once again, the superior eyesight of dogs; mine saw this coming years before I did.

We urge you to consult a reputable attorney and therapist before you make a dramatic decision. You'll certainly need them later so let them shore up the ground floor before the whole building collapses on you. Think 7.9 trembler. This will accomplish one of two things: either you will discover it's you who's screwed or you'll discover that you're about to be. In either case, you will have a team that can help if you need them.

Logic doesn't work here, common sense doesn't exist here. Divorce is a combination of legal precedent, psychological warfare and the grace (or not) of the deity of your choice. And who was that patron saint of lost causes?

Fortitude is easy when there are no feelings. If you're living in a Menage a Trauma, then take the pheromone challenge: is there the scent of a psycho in your house? Are you the Chairman of the board and care?

Do you want to see a guilty person go free? Decide if you can save your marriage and also save yourself. Seek professional help, please. Couples therapy, support groups and Weight Watcher's are all waiting just for you. And we're here for you, too. "Who loves you baby?" We do.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
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